BDSM covers a WIDE range of practices that usually deal with pain and/or power. BDSMīondage/Discipline, Dominance/Submission, Sadism/Masochism – that’s what BDSM stands for. Punishments/discipline and rewards/praise are common with this kink. One sub-variant is the DDlg (or Daddy Dom, little girl) kink, where one partner plays the role of a dominant caregiver while the other plays the role of a younger more submissive person. Are you ready? Age PlayĪge play is a kink where one or more people enjoy roleplaying a different age than what they actually are. And whether you’re the former or the latter, you’re still kinky! It’s also important to remember that some people might just have one kink, while others may have multiple kinks that overlap and intertwine. If you can imagine it, there’s probably a kink for it. But first, we have to stress that this list of kinks is by no means everything. We’ll get into our list of fetishes and kinks in just a bit. In most cases, the person with the fetish cannot be sexually excited without the presence of that object or part. If you have a fetish, it means that you find a particular body part (like the breasts), act (like smoking), or object (like bra & panties) sexually arousing. And what constitutes the “norm” varies from person to person, place to place, and generation to generation.įetish, on the other hand, is a little bit easier to define. This is because “kinky” sex is any sexually arousing act that is considered “unconventional” or “out of the norm”. For others, it’s not kinky until the whips and chains come out. For some people, dirty talk or anal could be considered kinky. The tricky thing about defining “kink” and “fetish” is that it changes depending on who you ask. … But this Yes/No/Maybe List is a little different.RELATED: Why Netflix’s chilling documentary ‘Voyeur’ is a must-watch What Does Kinky Mean? What Is A Fetish? Brainstorm together and see what you can come up with that I didn’t, and then add it to the list. If you’re interested in cock and ball torture and your partner is into cognitive behavioral therapy you’re having two very different conversations.Īrguably some of the most useful pieces of Yes/No/Maybe Lists are their lists of activities and terms, and although mine is extensive, it is by no means exhaustive, so I encourage you to write in your own. Don’t only discuss what you want to do, also discuss what the words you’re using mean. Instead I usually prefer to have negotiation conversations like these in coffee shops or during long car rides. I also recognize that I am in the minority of folks who find spreadsheets sexy and I don’t expect you to fill out you Yes/No/Maybe Lists in your finest lingerie. It can be revisited often, as people’s preferences can fluctuate, and it’s a fun way to get new ideas and reflect on your own desires. Your Yes/No/Maybe List is a tool to use in an ongoing conversation about all the sexy things you want to do together. Your Yes/No/Maybe List is not a contract, it’s not consent, and it’s not set in stone. The goal here is to focus on the things you can do together and not dwell on the nos, You should NEVER try to talk someone out of their no or expect them to explain it to you, though they may choose to. Then the partners reconvene and discuss where their yesses overlap. and sorts each one into one of three columns: Yes, No, or Maybe. It’s simple, each person involved in the negotiation takes a list of activities/terms/food items etc. A Yes/No/Maybe list is a common tool in kink circles for negotiating scenes, but really, you could use it to negotiate… pretty much anything.
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